every day when you come home from work, i get so excited to see your smile when you see me. every day apart, i look forward to that first five minuets spent together. reacquainting ourselves with one another as if we haven’t seen each other in months. i feel the most alive at that moment in time, every. single. day. it never gets old. my day can be terrible, work can suck for each of us, and...
for the most part
i’m lost, as usual. i force others to believe i have the world figured out, that i have myself all put together. it’s believable, trust me, i usually believe it too… but there are times where i forget who i truly am. when you contacted me.. my mind went blank. i couldn’t remember anymore - who i was, how far i’ve came. it’s not easy to look into the past, when...
It makes me sad that you’re sad. I should hate you, but instead I pity you. I wish there was something I could do.
I hate my life.
I only wish he'd understand the person I am.
Im a giving women. I could care less about material objects. I could care less about money. The only thing in the world I want is for the people I love and care about to share the happiness I feel when I take care of them. The happiness I feel when we share time, laughs and love. And for him, there is no amount of money I wouldn’t spend. No depths I wouldn’t go trough to show him the...
i'm falling apart
This is always where I seem to go to hide from my feelings. To get out how I feel, to someone… or no one… or maybe myself. I am tired of hiding. I am tired of being anxious. I am tired of worrying. If what I am doing at any given time doesn’t involve sleeping, working, or being with my 3 closest friends.. my mind goes insane. Even being alone in my boyfriends apartment, where I...
For once in my life I thought things would work out.
I want a different life.
Im the happiest when im in his arms.
crazy thoughts for a crazy girl.
it’s crazy to think that we were ever in love. crazy to realize now, after a year, that it feels as if i never even met you. it’s as if i never spent a day of my life with you. as if i never looked into your eyes and truly felt your emotions and mine. as if i never helped you in any way, and you me. as if we never went through the insane bullshit we went through together. as if three...
All I want in this world is a day where only you and I exist. 24 hours spent getting lost in each others eyes.
i fell asleep next to you as i always do. our bodies lazily laying intertwined. when it came time to fall asleep, we kissed and separated. the storm outside made everything so peaceful. hearing the rain hit the ground and the cars outside of your apartment was so relaxing. you slipped your hand between my face and the pillow, not a single other part of our bodies touching at this point. with the...
The way the sunlight shines through your eyelashes and into your green eyes makes me love waking up next to you everyday. Its almost enough light to see your soul, that of which is strong, and loving, and caring, yet broken and afraid to show itself. I’ll see it one of these beautiful mornings - when the sunlight hits just right, im sure of this. And when that day comes, I know the time will...
none of you can save me.
i have this over whelming dark cloud hanging over my head, impending doom upon myself and those around me. i wish to leave this place. abandon everything and everyone who has grown to love me, and whom i have grown to love. it sickens me to think that i can easily move on, forget all of your faces, and start a new life at any given moment. to pack my bags and leave would be a life saver. but...
how down-right insane is it that someone who betrayed you so many years ago, can make your heart beat so fast again. after five years of not seeing someone, and resenting them, you fall for them. i guess it’s true that people change, it’s true that people deserve second chances. we’re no longer teenagers playing some silly bullshit game, we’ve grown up. we’ve lived...
There pass the careless people That call their souls their own; Here by the road I loiter, How idle and alone. Ah, past the plunge of plummet, In seas I cannot sound, My heart and soul and senses, World without end, are drowned. His folly has not fellow Beneath the blue of day That gives to man or woman His heart and soul away. There flowers no balm to sain him From east of...
Are amazing and making you forget.
I really hate it when people sleep longer than 8 hours. Shit, 6 is my limit. So when someone stays the night I am pretty aware of the fact that they may be one of those sleepers who has to have the full 8. But when I’ve been staring at my ceiling for two hours because THEIR phone keeps going off, I find it incredible that they can still sleep. It’s almost nauseating having to stare at...
so much pain I could vomit
Lately a lot of things from my past have been brought up. Things I didn’t know about, things I never wanted to know about. It’s hard enough being best friends with two of your ex’s old friends. Stories are constantly being shared. His name is constantly being brought up. It’s been seven months since we fell apart, plenty of time for me to be over it. When you love someone...